


hard liquor mixed with a bit of intellect

by bodhirookes



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Bad Boy Ryan Bergara, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, Light Angst, M/M, Minor Violence, Ryan's just a nerd who likes to wear leather jackets, but not actually, lots of fluff, that dank bad boy is actually a giant nerd trope, there's a fight scene but it's nothing too gross, this is basically a whole fic about Ryan Bergara deserving love and affection
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-02
Updated: 2018-09-02
Packaged: 2019-07-06 02:28:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,746
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15876597
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bodhirookes/pseuds/bodhirookes
Summary: “What happened to him?” Steven asks, after getting all his stuff out of his backpack. “He looks Level 5 Distressed and it’s only been two hours since we’ve seen him.”“He said that the new kid flirted with him,” Sara supplies. “And that he thinks he’s in love with him.”“The new kid is in love with Shane?”“No,” Shane wails. “I’min love withhim!”A beat of silence, and then Steven sighs.“This is going to be a long fucking year. It’s only mid-September, Madej.”~In the middle of senior year, Ryan Bergara moves to town, strides into school with a leather jacket and a motorcycle helmet, gives everyone the same cool, piercing look, and laughs with a sweet lunch lady all on his first day.Shane is maybe a little smitten.





	hard liquor mixed with a bit of intellect

**Author's Note:**

> howdy guys gals and non-binary pals :-) i'm back w some more ghouligans nonsense!!! and it's another high school au!!!! why do i do these things!!!! 
> 
> in between writing chapters for “show me what i’m looking for” i still did some shyan writing/warm-ups by shuffling all my music and writing a little drabble to go with whatever song came on and out popped this monster as soon as the song kiwi by harry styles started playing, so uhhhhhh enjoy some bad boy ryan bergara and swooning nerd ass shane madej. what can i say????? my favorite book is the outsiders and i’m helplessly in love with the greaser look and i think ryan steven bergara would pop a few blood vessels (and some boners wink wonk) if he ever slicked his hair back and wore a leather jacket and some black boots jsjsjdjjfsj also i’m a sucker for the bad-boy-is-actually-smarter-than-everyone-in-the-whole-fucking-school trope (◡‿◡✿)
> 
> title is from kiwi because i hate myself and the lyric fits perfectly also like i wrote to the general vibe of kiwi but someone tell me what the fuck that song even is like what kinda doobage was harry styles on when he wrote the lyrics to that song 
> 
> all you really need to know is that i based almost every single outfit of ryan's off of something i've seen jeon jeongguk wear to the airport or to weekly idol, since jeongguk also likes to pretend he's a badass when he's just a giant nerd, so you're welcome

Keith’s got a french fry halfway to his mouth when he chokes and says: “Oh my God,” without any context.

Shane’s halfway through his (late) reading for AP Lit when he looks up to see what Keith’s freaking out about and consequently forgets everything he’d just been glancing over.

The new kid finally shows up where Shane can see him, and based on the descriptions he’d been hearing all morning, he’s a little pissed that someone didn’t fucking  _warn_ him more. He’s shorter than Shane by a good six inches, but his rock-solid arm muscles, slick black hair, and well-worn leather jacket make up for that pretty damn well. He doesn’t glance around the cafeteria as he swaggers over to where they keep the pizza slices, even though literally every single pair of eyes is trained on his broad back. He silently grabs a slice, also grabs a water bottle on his way to the lunch lady and her cash register, and even from across the room, Shane can see the glint in his dark eyes. The cool, hard look on his face punches Shane right in the gut.

“He looks like he just walked off of the set of  _The_  fuckin’  _Outsiders_ , man.” Andrew says around a mouthful of pretzels. “No one in the entire world greases their hair and wears a leather jacket besides Eugene.”

Eugene chucks a carrot stick at Andrew from the other end of the table, and Andrew gives him a dumb little smile. “Fuck you. I look like a stylish biker when I wear my jacket. He looks like a member of a gang.”

“I’d join that gang.” Daysha leans around Jen to get a better look at him, eyes traveling from head to toe. “He looks like he could take out a hundred guys with a single look. Amazing.”

Jen nods. “Even I’d join that gang.”

Shane laughs at her, eyes never leaving where the new kid is still cashing out, drawn to his tight black pants and tight burgundy shirt like a moth to flame. He’s making light conversation with the lunch lady, which surprises Shane, but gives him an excuse to watch the kid’s mouth move and make new shapes, so he’s not that concerned.

“Anyone got any classes with him?” Zach asks, sneaking one of Eugene’s carrot sticks. Shane forces himself to attempt to focus on his friends, and looks over at Zach with a literal shake of his head, as if trying to erase the new kid from his mind like an Etch-A-Sketch.

Steven lazily wiggles his fingers. “I think I might have math with him, but he didn’t show up today. Collins was talking on the phone about someone not coming to the right class when we all piled in this morning.”

“I’ve got Chem with him.” Sara announces, and Shane glances down to where she is at his left. “He didn’t say anything in class and Nelson didn’t make him introduce himself to the class, so I didn’t catch his name. Took notes like a good little science student, though, which is already better than Ned.”

“Fuck off, Rubin.”

Shane snorts and turns, helplessly, back to the new kid. He’s wrapping up his conversation with the lunch lady, body slanting farther away from her while he maintains eye contact . He assumes it’s about how the pay system works for lunches until the kid does something that makes Shane’s insides go off like a rocket.

He laughs, open and bright, and thanks her before slipping away to find a table. Shane’s mouth falls open in shock, looking at those big, pretty teeth and the genuine delight on his face, and he already feels himself heading towards something he probably shouldn’t.

When the kid finds a table by himself to sit at, close to some windows, he ends up sitting so that his back is to the wall and his face is out towards everyone else in the cafeteria. Shane watches as he settles himself down into a chair, props his feet up on another, and takes a huge, messy bite of pizza. It’s almost endearing, despite the guy’s overall appearance and disposition, and Shane continues with his helpless staring.

The guy’s in the middle of taking another big bite when he looks up and makes direct eye contact with Shane. Shane stares for another heartbeat or two, frozen by how fucking attractive he is even with his mouth hanging open and pizza sauce on his cheek, and then he bodily jerks his head away from the new kid, ears burning bright red. He begs for death over and over again in his head while Keith starts to go off about something with Zach, Eugene, and Ned, and stabs uselessly at his gloopy mac n’ cheese.

He chances a look out of the corner of his eyes, after a few minutes, just to see if the kid is still looking over at him too, and is infinitely relieved to see that he’s occupied by eating his pizza and dinking around on his phone. He lets his eyes linger over the bulge of his biceps and hunch of his shoulders for a few seconds, and then re-forces himself to jump in on the conversation to avoid suspicion or getting caught. He mostly manages to forget about the new kid, but even in between the pockets of conversation about Zach and Eugene’s latest date spot discovery and how much of a dingdong their shared AP Econ teacher is, Shane is thinking about the newest student and his scary appearance and the way he beamed at a lunch lady like she was his mom.

When they’re all leaving the cafeteria for fourth period, Shane’s in the middle of talking about something with Sara when he catches a flash of burgundy and looks up in time to lock eyes with the new kid, only much, much closer. People all around them are staring at him and some are whispering, but for a few seconds, it’s just him and Shane looking at each other. Shane feels his breath catch in his throat and stick, so shocked by how  _beautiful_ the boy is, even when he’s staring at Shane like he’s a piece of meat, like he’s the new freak of the class. Then, the kid smirks and turns away, disappearing out of the double doors in the cafeteria without a word.

“What the hell?” Keith asks him, and Shane just shrugs because he really doesn’t know what to say.

He glances down at Sara, and all she has to give him is a smaller version of the new guy’s look before Shane finds himself resisting the urge to run down to the band room to hide for the rest of the day.

**_~.~.~_ **

Shane walks comfortably into sixth period AP Lit, mind completely on the presentation he and Jen have to do on taking a vacation to somewhere in Germany (all in German, of course, thanks to Frau Butler and German 4A). He expects nothing out of the ordinary when he takes his normal seat, absently waiting for Sara, Zach, and Steven to show up to their shared table, and for a while, he’s stuck in a trance of picking which side of Germany they should ‘visit’.

He’s so distracted that when someone slides into the seat across from him, he automatically starts speaking without looking, wrongfully assuming that it’s Steven.

“Hey, what do you think about visiting Leipzig for a vacation and going to a Mozart cover orchestra for one of the nights?”

When he looks up, he expects to be met by Steven and his eager, saxophone-loving ass smiling dreamily at the thought of hearing Mozart’s music in person, but instead he gets a dark, amused look and a smirk that looks suspiciously like a smile.

“Isn’t the point of vacation to enjoy yourself?” the new kid asks, grinning wolfishly at Shane’s amazed staring. “Also, are you asking me out on a date? You don’t even know my name.”

“Um,” he replies intelligently, caught completely off guard by the new kid’s sharp teeth and strikingly bright eyes being so close to him. “I’m sorry, I thought you were Steven.”

This makes the guy’s smirk grow. “I thought Steven was dating that Andrew dude.”

Shane feels sweat bead up on his forehead. “He is.”

The new kid leans forward, and when it makes his muscles even more prominent, Shane swallows around the rock in his throat. “You guys got a side thing going on, then?”

“Not that I’m aware of-”

“Good,” he interrupts, and his wolfish grin softens down into something that’s more amusement than sarcasm. “Because the way you were staring at me in the lunchroom would beg to differ if you two were actually dating.”

A hot, obvious blush blooms across Shane’s face, and the new guy has the audacity to laugh at him, the same pretty, distracting laugh he let out in the cafeteria, and Shane doesn’t even know what to do with himself. He knows he’s staring again but he can’t himself look away.

Luckily, Mrs. Peterson jumps in and saves him (not for the first or last time, since Peterson has a huge soft spot for him for some unknown reason).

“You must be the infamous Ryan Bergara,” she says, coming to stop next to the table. When Ryan looks up at her, Shane expects him to scowl or give her a smartass response, but instead, he just calms down and nods politely. Peterson softens almost immediately and that’s when Shane knows that he’s well and truly fucked. “You look more like a businessman than a hardened criminal. Trust the math department to run wild with stupid stories about  _seniors_. Let’s get you some course material, James Dean.”

The kid-  _Ryan-_  agrees easily and stands up, but not without giving Shane another amused grin and a parting, “Later, Stud.”

When Sara and Zach arrive together from Calculus, they find Shane’s face smushed into his desktop, a clear sign of distress.

“What’s up?” Sara asks, sitting down next to him. “Frau Butler fucking you and Jen over like usual?”

“I wish,” Shane mutters. “I think Ryan Bergara just flirted with me.”

Sara and Zach are silent for a beat, and then ask: “Who?” at the same time.

Without looking up, Shane jerks a thumb over his shoulder and waits as they follow it until resting their eyes upon the intense-looking new kid, who looks decidedly not intense at all and mostly curious as he flips through a battered copy of  _Wuthering Heights_.

“Oh dear,” Zach says, and reaches out to pat Shane’s hand. “Are you okay, dude?”

Shane finally lifts his head up and looks directly into his eyes long enough to say: “I think I might be in love.” before slamming his head back onto the table.

Steven arrives a minute later and Shane doesn’t have to look up again to know that he’s trying to decide whether or not to ask what’s wrong.

“What happened to  _him_?” he asks, after getting all his stuff out of his backpack. “He looks Level 5 Distressed and it’s only been two hours since we’ve seen him.”

“He said that the new kid flirted with him.” Sara supplies. “And that he thinks he’s in love with him.”

“The new kid is in love with Shane?”

“ _No_ ,” Shane wails, feeling utterly broken. “ _I’m_ in love with  _him!_ ”

A beat of silence much like Sara’s and Zach’s from earlier, and then Steven sighs.

“This is going to be a long fucking year. It’s only mid-September, Madej.”

Shane wails again, and wonders if Peterson will let him brain himself with a copy of  _Jane Eyre_  until he blacks out.

**_~.~.~_ **

It doesn’t get better from there, much to the dismay of Shane and literally everyone else in the group. The more he tries to ignore his feelings, the more Ryan does his best to pop up in random places to mess with him and ask him the most inane things about his friends.

One day, while Shane’s deciding between a sad looking banana and a wilted salad for his lunch side, Ryan shows up out of nowhere and asks him:

“So do you and Steven actually secretly make out behind Andrew’s back?”

Shane chokes on nothing and turns to look at him- a fatal mistake, if his tight olive shirt and tight black jeans are anything to go by. “No, man- Steven and I are not into each other.”

“Are you sure? The other day he went up to ask Peterson a question and your eyes followed him all the way up there and stayed.”

“That’s because you sit-” Shane forcefully cuts himself off, finally seeing the corner Ryan has backed him into. “Sorry, I have to go. I suddenly remembered that I have a cliff to jump off of,” he tells him, and then scurries off with the salad to one of the available lunch ladies, Ryan’s laugh following him.

Some other day, they’re in AP Lit, and Shane’s trying to figure out how to untangle a charger from the cart of school laptops when Ryan crouches down next to him and asks:

“Do you have a thing for short guys? Steven’s kinda short.”

“Steven’s taller than you,” Shane mutters, doing his best not to snap the adapter off of the end of a charger. “He’s actually almost as tall as I am, so that makes zero sense. Try again.”

He refuses to look over at Ryan, who is wearing a beanie and a stylish hoodie and looks devastatingly beautiful without even trying. It’s almost impossible, though, when Ryan giggles softly and attempts to help Shane untangle a charger.

“Do you have a thing for guys who really like pizza?”

“Everyone likes pizza.”

“What about guys who like wearing jackets?”

Shane does chance a look over at him, trying not to smile, and finds it pretty easy to accomplish because Ryan makes him more nervous than anything. “Why do you keep asking me questions about Steven? I told you, man, we don’t like each other like that.” He pauses. “Do  _you_  like Steven like that? I’m telling you right now that you’re shit out of luck if that’s the case.”

Ryan stares back at him, both of them looking like little eggs huddled together on the floor of their fucking AP Lit classroom, and says nothing for a few seconds. When he does, Shane is so focused on the cute little wrinkle between his eyebrows that he doesn’t really take in the expression on Ryan’s face.

“Aren’t you at the top of our class?”

Shane blinks. “Yeah?”

And then Ryan rolls his eyes and stands up, sending a waft of some soft, masculine vanilla scent Shane’s way. “I don’t see why.”

On some random morning, Shane’s minding his own business in the library while waiting for Sara to arrive with Jen and Eugene, when Ryan fucking Bergara shows up like some kind of fairy godmother, puts his ass very close to Shane’s math homework, crosses his thick arms over his thick chest, and asks:

“Are you just trying to win Steven over? Is that it?”

It’s 7:35 in the morning, so all he can really do is blink stupidly up at Ryan; he, for the record, looks as excruciatingly tired as Shane probably does, but also _fond_ , and that makes Shane’s sleep-addled heart skip a few beats.

“What do you mean?”

Ryan uses a knuckle to knock on the top of his head. “How close are you to being all the way there?”

“I’d say I’m at a solid 17% right now.”

This makes Ryan laugh softly, and makes Shane’s body break out into little itty bitty goosebumps.

“I mean, do you actually like Steven? And are you trying to compete with Andrew for his love?”

Maybe it’s because it’s so early in the morning, and the early hours turn everything into a soft, unfocused kind of warmth, but Shane feels every single one of his scared and/or intimidated feelings towards Ryan turn into something mushy. He’s honestly still really not sure what’s going on, if Ryan is really flirting with him or if it’s just an elaborate way for Ryan to cope with transferring to a new school. But, maybe what Ryan is looking for is a friend, and if it takes Shane indulging in his weird Q&A game, he thinks maybe he should do it. What’s the worst that could happen?

“I, in no way, shape, or form want to date Steven. Not only is Steven just a good friend who understands and maybe even rivals my obsession with John Mulaney, but he’s also been dating Andrew since we were all in, like, kindergarten, so I’d be a fucking idiot for trying to get in the middle of that.”

“Since kindergarten?” Ryan whispers, a little amazed. He looks unbearably adorable, even with his leather jacket on and his hair still a mess from riding his motorcycle to school.  

Shane nods. “Give or take a few years, but yeah, they’re practically married already. I bet if he had the money to, Andrew would already have a ring picked out and stashed in the back of his underwear drawer.”

In response, Ryan gives him a full-on grin. There’s none of his trademark sass in it, or any hidden meaning- it’s just a big, toothy smile full of something Shane would probably call awe if he could get his brain back online.

“That’s really sweet,” he cooes. “And it really clears some stuff up for me. So, thanks.”

He doesn’t know what any of this means, but all Shane can really do is nod back at him. “Sure. You’re welcome, I guess. Do you believe me now when I say that I don’t have a crush on Steven?”

Ryan gives him another soft, cryptic look, as if he’s trying to unscramble Shane or send him his own cryptic message, but when Shane just continues to stare back at him, no more awake than he was before Ryan sat on his homework, he just sighs deeply and nods.

“Yeah, I believe you. I’ll see you in Lit.”

Before Ryan can walk away, Shane finds himself reaching out to close his hand softly around Ryan’s wrist, the one holding his helmet.

“Wait-” Ryan’s soft doe eyes make his stomach lurch, but instead of letting it distract him, he gives Ryan’s wrist a gentle squeeze. “I still don’t really understand what’s going on here. Can’t you sit down with me and talk about it? I promise I’m not being an asshole- I’m just really oblivious.”

The other boy glances at the empty chairs of Shane’s table, the longing on his face plain as day, but he still shakes his head.

“Sorry, but I’ve got some work to do. Lots of Chemistry and Macroeconomics to catch up on if I want to switch into AP for those next semester.”

While Shane’s picking his heart and soul up off of the ground, Ryan eases their hands away from each other and gives Shane a quiet, “See you,” and slips out of the library. He watches as Ryan makes his way towards the science hallway, and even sees it when some of the football players yell something to him and Ryan just silently gives them the finger.

Ryan Bergara is a strange, strange kid and Shane is absolutely gone on him without knowing when or how.

The other three find him with his face hidden in his folded arms, and Sara already knows he’s had an encounter with Ryan without Shane telling her.

“We need to stop meeting like this,” she scolds, but runs a hand through his obnoxious bed head anyways. “Just ask him out, Shane.”

Shane turns his face up to her and gives her a ridiculous pout. “I don’t think he likes me, Sara. I think this is just some scheme for him to make it through this semester with some sort of excitement.”

“Wow,” Eugene says, eyebrows high on his forehead. “You really don’t belong in the Top 25, huh?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Shane asks, suddenly cranky. He wants to sound and look like an angry mob boss but he knows he probably just looks like a grouchy pomeranian. “I wish everyone would stop speaking to me in code. You’ve all apparently forgotten that I’m a dumbass.”

“I definitely did not forget. If you don’t know what’s going on yet, then there’s really nothing I can do for you. You’re on your own for this one.”

“You’re telling me this like I haven’t already been on my own the whole damn time.” Shane glares down at his half-finished homework. “All you cryptic pretty boys are cordially invited to suck my dick and stop being mean to me.”

“No on both of those invitations from me.” Eugene snorts, and gives Shane another one of his specialty  _you’re a complete imbecile_  looks. “All in good time, Madej. You’ll get it together soon or Bergara will get it together for you. There’s not a single doubt in my mind. Barring the fact that you are, in fact, a dumbass, and might make it worse rather than better. Good luck.”

**_~.~.~_ **

After their weird but nice chat in the library, Ryan slowly begins to open up to the idea of hanging out with Shane and his friends. It’s nothing sudden or close to a complete integration, but it’s there.

It starts out with eating lunch with the group. One day at lunch, Sara comes into the cafeteria with Ryan at her side and convinces him to sit with them. They all easily accept Ryan’s added presence at the table, and even though Ryan is extremely quiet and timid around them (something Shane is not used to at  _all_ ), he makes an effort to keep up with the conversations happening. Sara tries to get him into the flow of things by complaining about Chemistry- their shared third period class- and Ryan makes a few comments here and there, but it’s nothing compared to his usual snarky remarks. But, all it takes is some random crack from Jen about the ‘straighties’ at their school to get Ryan to laugh and then he’s in on conversations like he’d been there the whole time. His appearance at the table for lunch is spotty for almost two weeks before Zach tells him kindly that he’s welcome to sit with them every day, and then Ryan starts sitting with them all the time. Sometimes he’ll sit by Jen and they’ll chat the whole time, and sometimes he’ll sit down by Zach and Eugene and get help with his AP Econ stuff, but most of the time, he sits next to Shane and Sara and they have the time of their lives together.

There’s still a lot of hesitation in Ryan whenever he interacts with all of them, though, that Shane can’t quite figure out. He doesn’t know the origin of the hesitation or why Ryan seems to hold back a lot despite getting along with them all so well. He fits like another missing piece in the whole picture of their group, seamless and  _needed_ , but Shane can tell that he’s still holding them all at arm’s length

It makes his heart hurt if he thinks about it too closely. He feels like Ryan is his friend and a complete stranger at the same time, like he wants to ask Ryan why he won’t let himself get close to them but can’t because he doesn’t know Ryan well enough to ask him such a personal question. Because Ryan does other things to show that he wants to be included in the group while he also shows that none of them are allowed to look at him too closely. They’ve invited him down to the band room a handful of times to cram into a practice room and shoot the shit in between everyone practicing their music, and when they find out that Ryan can play the guitar, he lights up at their praise and jealousy. He’ll even go out to dinner with them all at some fast food restaurant and act like he’s been their friend for as long as they’ve all been friends, but Shane will still see a crease appear between his eyebrows, or a look of hesitation when Keith invites him to go to the arcade with him, Ned, and Daysha during the upcoming weekend.

He joins them almost every single time they all hang out to study together. They always break off into little groups per class and help each other out, and then switch groups until all subjects have been covered. Ryan switches easily between all the AP classes everyone shares- Chem, Lit, Econ, Calculus- and fits easily into each of them because he’s whip-smart and quick on his feet and always makes studying more enjoyable than it actually is. But even when they’re just studying together and Sara’s trying to make up a story with flashcards to help them all remember the difference between price and income elasticity in demand, Ryan only lets them get so close to him. It’s like he’s holding his breath around them, like he’s holding back because he thinks they’re all going to start treating him like the other kids at their school. Think that he’s some no-good, greaser-looking asshole who’s too smart for his own good and nothing but a troublemaker. They all try to get him to open up without directly asking him what happened, what made him feel like he didn’t deserve to have friends or be friends with them, but no one can really think of a good way to ask him about it without freaking him out.

It hurts like a bitch when Shane lets himself think about it for more than a passing moment. He knows what Ryan Bergara looks like when he’s laughing at some stupid Chemistry pun Zach made or talking animatedly about bands he likes with Jen and Eugene or eating something he’s enjoying thoroughly and can’t tell them all about it enough. He knows that under the cool-as-ice smirk and the slicked-back hair and the well-loved leather jacket and the hard set of his jaw that Ryan Bergara is just a giant marshmallow who wants to be friends with them. And Shane can’t figure out why he doesn’t think he deserves to be friends with them. Even when Steven had gone out of his way to pick Ryan as his partner for their Greek and Biblical stories project in AP Lit, he can still see that Ryan is waiting for the other shoe to drop. Apparently, Steven telling him that he should be David during their telling and re-enactment of the story of David and Goliath because he was “ripped as hell and full of a righteous fury,” isn’t enough to convince Ryan that they all really like him.

He knows how good Ryan is, how smart and creative and funny he is, but he doesn’t know how to tell Ryan that without the other boy getting skittish and falling back into his too-cool-for-you-bad-boy-get-the-fuck-away-from-me persona that he only uses on the more popular, bitchy people in their grade. He wants Ryan know how truly amazing and deserving of friends he is, but he doesn’t know where to even start in getting him to believe Shane and the group. He keeps waiting for a good opportunity to present itself.

One presents itself at the beginning of November, weeks after Ryan has been at their school and placed himself precariously at the edge of being in Shane’s group of friends. When he thinks about it later, he’ll kick himself for wishing so badly for an opportunity to come to him and then receiving the shitty opening given to him (it’s mostly given to Ryan). He’ll also kick himself for not realizing how deep his affection for the other boy runs until he sees Ryan get punched in the face.

He’s propped up against the locker next to Sara’s, chattering with her about how ridiculous it is to be taking Art 1 as a senior (“ _I’m literally surrounded by freshman and sophomores, Sara. The only senior in that class with me is Brent and he has the artistic drive of a wet piece of cardboard.”_ ), when another short person pops up at his left.

“How the fuck does one recreate labs at home when you don’t own any test tubes or hydrochloric acid?”

Shane’s stomach does a weird thing when he sees it’s Ryan, hair styled to perfection and black t-shirt clinging to all of the right places, but does his best to not showcase how panicked he always gets when Ryan shows up.

“Not sure, buddy. I’ve never missed a lab day before.”

“You also didn’t transfer halfway across the state in the middle of September.”

Shane mimics him, and tries not to smile when Ryan punches him on the arm. “Fuck off, Madej, this is serious- there’s only three weeks left until the new semester and I have, like, twenty five labs to make up before then because our guidance counselor sucks weiner.”

“Oh God,” Sara moans, drawing Ryan’s attention away from Shane. “You went and talked to  _Mrs. Olsen_ about it? Who didn’t fucking warn you about her?”

Ryan’s mouth presses into a thin, annoyed line. “Yeah. No kidding.”

“You need to go see Sanders in Room 304- he always stays late to let kids make up labs and will even let you eat and drink if you stand off to the side to do it. He’ll help you through your labs really quickly if you ask him nicely.”

Shane didn’t notice exactly how tense Ryan was when he appeared next to them, but when Sara says this to him, he back straightens out like someone took two hundred pound weights off of him.

“You are literally an angel.” he tells her seriously. “I’m going to run over there and beg for help from him immediately. Thank you forever.”

Sara laughs and waves him off. “No problem, dude. I wish I would have known sooner so you could have been getting shit done immediately. Nelson also deserves a kick in the ass to be honest, for not telling you about Sanders sooner. Fucking science department.”

Ryan blows her a kiss and takes off down the hallway. Shane feels inclined to yell after him: “You’re welcome,” just to see Ryan laugh and flip him off, and he does exactly that.

He also misjudges his steps and ends up tripping into some girl, knocking the books in her hands onto the floor. Shane sees him stop, hands out in a very obvious apology, sees the girl smile and say something to him, and together, they pick her books off of the ground. And that should be the end of it.

Except, the girl is apparently dating Jason Palmer, some asshole that Shane has fortunately only had to speak to personally once or twice, and he takes great offense to Ryan accidentally bumping into his girlfriend.

“Watch where you’re fucking going, Bergara,” Jason says, loud enough to echo down the hallway, and puts himself in between the girl and Ryan. “You almost knocked her over, too, walking down the hallway like a fucking idiot.”

Everything that was open and easy about Ryan shuts up immediately, and in place is the cool, hardened image of the boy Shane saw two months ago in the cafeteria. The entire hallway quiets down, and every pair of eyes is trained on Ryan and Jason.

“It was an accident,” Ryan tells him coldly. “I said I was sorry, and she said it was fine. I don’t see what the fucking issue is.”

“The fucking issue is that you walk around these halls like you goddamn own them. You just got here a few weeks ago, and you’re already acting like you’ve been here the whole time. Can’t you just fuck off to whatever shitty school you came from?”

“Aw, shucks, wouldn’t you miss me if I left, though?” Ryan asks; Shane can see that his hands are shaking where they’re curled up into fists, and he feels himself take a step closer to Ryan. “There’d be no one left to tell you to fuck off when you start picking on kids half of your size.”

Jason sneers. “This place was just fucking fantastic before  _you_  got here. Didn’t have to listen to some slick asshole raise his hand to answer every single question like a know-it-all or run into my girlfriend because he’s too busy trying to get with some dude who clearly isn’t into him.”

A muscle twitches in Ryan’s neck, like he just choked, and Shane’s moving forward before he really knows what he’s doing.

“Why don’t you just fuck off and leave him alone?” Shane asks, very suddenly pissed. “It was an accident. I see you do worse to those kids on the Mathletes team just because they can do addition better than you.”

“Speaking of the boyfriend,” Jason applauds, and the loudness of it makes Shane flinch. “I guess I was wrong- you queers really do like each other.”

Shane has been out since he was a sophomore and he doesn’t really let homophobic comments affect him, so his knee-jerk reaction is just to say: “Wow, you got us. Good one, with that queer joke- I haven’t heard that one before.”  

Jason gives him a mean, disgusted look over Ryan’s head, but then Ryan is shoving into his space, close enough that he and Jason are almost chest-to-chest, and Shane’s stomach lurches.

“It sounds like you’re jealous, if I’m not mistaken.” Ryan says, dangerously soft and sweet. “You know, I’ve learned over the years that boys like you are too scared to admit that they’re into guys and they always take it out on the boys they want to get with.”

The hallway ices over, and Shane can’t even breathe, let alone ask Ryan what the fuck he thinks he’s doing. And then Ryan’s face turns into ice, as well, and he jabs a finger into Jason’s chest like a knife.

“I bet you anything in the world that that’s what’s going on here. I bet you $100 you’re gay and too scared to come out, and you’re just taking it out on me because you want me. Am I right?”

Jason is staring at Ryan in complete and utter shock, no emotion on his face other than blank surprise. His girlfriend is also staring at Ryan, but with something closer to disbelief.

Ryan pokes him again, hard enough to make Jason take a step back. “Well, that’s just too fucking bad. Because you got it right, asshole- I do like him, so that means we’re both very fucking off-limits. And that also means that I do not take you calling him a queer very well- or myself, for that goddamn matter. So if I ever hear you say something like that to me, him, or anyone else at this school again, I will fucking end you.”

The silence is deafening after Ryan’s speech, and no one moves. Ryan and Jason stare at each other, and Shane looks between them, caught between trying to figure out how to get Ryan out of there immediately and figure out if Ryan just confessed to liking Shane.

And then Jason cocks his hand back and slams it right into Ryan’s chin. Ryan reels from the force of the hit, and Shane thinks he’s going to collapse on the ground, his stomach roiling and rising, but Ryan just steadies himself and says:

“Oh, so that’s how this is gonna go?”

And then he hands Jason his ass.

Shane watches helplessly as Ryan starts laying into Jason, who quickly loses the fight he started, until Ryan’s got him on the ground and in a chokehold. They both have bloody noses and some scratches, but Ryan’s grinning like he just won the fucking lottery, and Shane moves to get him off of and away from Jason.

“How you feeling now, Palmer?” Ryan asks him, almost shouting, and flexes his muscles so hard that Jason chokes on air. “Got anything else to tell us in that homophobic repertoire of yours now that a  _queer’s_  got you pinned to the floor like some fucking bottom  _bitch_?”

Jason yells through his gritted teeth, but no matter how much he struggles, Ryan’s hold just tightens until they’re all afraid that he’s going to snap Jason’s neck. This is when Shane finally feels his feet unglue from the floor, and he stumbles towards where the two are on the floor together.

“Ryan, you need to get off of him before you get fucking expelled, you idiot-”

At that precise moment, Peterson comes hustling down the hallway with Jason’s girlfriend behind her, and dread fills Shane up like water in a house.

“What is going on here?” she demands, and fearlessly goes right for Ryan and Jason. She curls a hand in both of their shirts and gives them a hard yank. “Both of you get up _right now_.”

Ryan gives Jason one last flex, just to hear him splutter and gurgle again, and then he lets go, getting to his feet easily. Shane, still kneeling on the floor, watches him get up with numb legs and a numb tongue.

“You too, Jason.” Peterson gives his shirt another hard yank, and Jason manages to clamber to his feet in much rougher shape than Ryan.

“He started it,” Jason tries, even though he looks absolutely pitiful with blood running down his chin and bruises already forming on his neck.

Peterson gives him a look that is pure, hot rage. “I find that hard to believe. And I’m going to be sure to tell Principle Haven the same thing, since you seem to think it’s your God-given right to bully and physically assault anyone you don’t think is ‘normal’.”

Without another word, she drags them both down the hallway towards the front office, Ryan going willingly and Jason cursing the entire way. Eventually, another teacher shows up and barks at them all to go to class, and Sara has to come and help Shane get to his feet.

“I shouldn’t have said anything,” Shane says miserably. “He got punched because of me.”

“No, he didn’t.” Sara tells him, soft but serious. Shane feels like he can’t breathe properly, like he’s the one Ryan had in a chokehold. “He got punched because he was right.”

It doesn’t make him feel any better, knowing that Ryan cut Jason and his bullshit down right to the bone. It makes him feel even more like a caged animal, like he’s going to flip the entire school upside down if he can’t go and see if Ryan is okay immediately. Instead of running after Peterson and the boys, he lets Sara pull him towards their fourth period AP Econ class and tries to make his hands stop shaking. Even when Sara holds onto both of them under the table and talks to him in a quiet voice about how Ryan is going to be fine, Shane feels like he’s going to vibrate right out of his skin.

**_~.~.~_ **

Shane barely makes it to 6th period without losing his shit, but when he gets there, Ryan is nowhere to be seen. He’s usually waiting by Shane’s desk to fuck around with him before class starts, but this time, there’s only an empty table where Shane, Sara, Steven, and Zach sit together.

“He’s still in the office.”

Shane looks over at Peterson, where she’s typing something up on her laptop. “Still?”

She nods. “It took a long time for Haven to believe me when I said Ryan didn’t start the fight, and even longer for Haven to believe Ryan. He had to get cleaned up afterwards and didn’t feel up to class.”

Since they’re the only ones in the class still, Shane goes to her desk. “Can I go see him?”

Peterson looks at him evenly. “I don’t know if they’ll let you back there with him-”

“I don’t know what he told you, exactly, but he got punched standing up for me.” Shane’s chest feels tight with anxiety. “For both of us. For  _us._ Please just let me go see if he’s okay.”

She writes him a note without any more arguing. As she’s scribbling down his excuse and her signature, Peterson tells him with a soft, melancholy smile: “He really is a lot like David. I can see why Steven picked that one for them.”

He sucks in a breath and tries not to burst into tears, hands curling and uncurling around the straps of his backpack. “You have no idea, Mrs. Peterson. Neither does he.”

When she hands over the pass, Shane scurries down to the office, using his height to weave through students easily and barely stopping enough to say “Sorry,” to the people he bumps into on his way.

When he gets to the office, by some miracle, the secretary is gone. He can see Ryan’s black boots where they’re peeking out from around the corner and also sees that Ryan is bouncing them up and down, like he’s trying to distract himself or release some of his own festering anxiety. Shane quietly shuts the office door and goes to Ryan, skin prickling and heart somersaulting.

Ryan looks better than he hoped, with just some bruising around his nose and chin and some scratches on his cheeks and forehead. He looks up when Shane stops in front of him, eyes wide and full of a sadness that makes Shane want to cry, is already starting to make his eyes fill a little as though they haven’t been filling since Peterson dragged him and Jason away two hours ago. 

“I’m sorry,” Ryan says, voice breaking, when he gets a good look at Shane. “I didn’t mean to drag you into this-”

“No, no, no,” Shane stops him, and before he knows what he’s doing, he’s kneeling and pulling Ryan into a tight hug. “Jesus, Ryan, I thought he was going to fucking knock you out. He could have hurt you really badly, _fuck_.”

Shane’s heart breaks when Ryan hugs him back tightly and he feels Ryan’s shoulders start to quiver, feels his shirt turn damp from tears. Shane holds him through it, feeling angry and protective and fiercely hurt all at the same time, and vows to anyone and everyone and himself that he will go to the ends of the earth to protect Ryan Bergara. The noises Ryan makes as he’s crying sound like something a wounded animal would make, and they leave Shane breathless with rage.

When Ryan calms down enough to stop sobbing, and just sits with his forehead pressed to the front of Shane’s shirt, he takes a deep breath.

“That’s the reason I had to transfer here so suddenly.” Ryan whispers, and Shane swipes a thumb across the back of his neck. “I came out at school and everyone fucking flipped. I thought it would be okay, coming out right as senior year started and only having to put up with them for another year, and I didn’t want to hide it anymore, but people kept attacking me and hunting me down and my parents pulled me out because they thought someone was going to ki-”

Ryan chokes, cutting himself off, and Shane feels a tear slide out of his eye. He hurriedly brushes it away, tries not to let himself cry anymore, because this isn’t about him.

“I didn’t mean to pull you into this mess, but I couldn’t help myself.” Ryan tells him, after a few minutes. “You were one of the first people I saw here, on my first day. Getting a late pass from the front office because you woke up late. Thought you were the cutest boy I’d ever seen in my entire fucking life. I wasn’t going to get near you or try to get close to you, but then I saw you looking at me in the lunchroom and it was different from everyone else. All the others were staring at me like I was some kind of fucking freak, but you were staring at me like you were amazed by me.”

“I was,” Shane says honestly, because he still can’t really think straight. “I am. You  _are_  amazing.”

Ryan’s breath stutters against his chest, and he pulls his head away enough so that they can look at each other. There are still stray tears clinging to his eyelashes, and his face looks like Jason truly gave it a working-over, but he’s still the most beautiful person Shane has ever laid eyes on.

“What do you mean?” Ryan asks, and  _of_   _course_  he still doesn’t get it, even though he literally threatened to destroy Jason Palmer’s life for calling Shane a queer.

“Ryan, you’re  _incredible_. I don’t even know how to begin to tell you how incredible you are, to be honest. You- you’re trying your fucking best to get into all of these AP classes next semester while still juggling all of your regular classes because you  _want_  the challenge of AP classes. You’re so fucking smart it’s insane. And you’re so,  _so_  funny, Jesus, you’re the funniest person I think I’ve ever met in my entire goddamn life. It’s like you know every single punchline in the entire world that’s gonna make me laugh. And, even after being the smartest and funniest person I know, you’re  _so_ kind and thoughtful. Even when you try to make light of it or laugh it off, I know how much you care about everyone in the group. You do so much for us and you never want anything in return. How could I not be amazed by you?”

Ryan stares at him, tears building and falling freely from his eyes, hold tightening on Shane’s sweater. Shane stares back at him and tries to make him see everything that Ryan has done to make Shane fall for him, and their friends fall for him.

They stare at each other for what could be days, and then Shane tells him softly: “You don’t have to go through this alone. I’ll be there with you through this, all right? And so will the others- I know you’re scared to get close to us, but I promise you that no one is going to turn their back on you. We’re good people. You’re a good person. We’ll be there for you. We all love you so fucking much- our group would be incomplete without your smartass remarks and your impersonations of Christopher Walken.”

Ryan weakly laughs at him, swaying forwards like he can’t help it, like the promise of having friends is too good to be true and too good for him to resist. “You guys really want me to be a part of the group?  _You_  really want me to be a part of the group? Even though I got into a fist fight for you?”

Shane smiles. “ _Especially_  because you got into a fist fight protecting me. That’s fucking hot.”

Ryan laughs again, one of his genuine, toothy grins in place, and he loops his arms around Shane’s neck. “You never even said if you liked me back.”

The rock in Shane’s stomach is suddenly replaced by the sun, warmth spreading into all of the cold, pointed edges. “Aren’t you at the top of our class?”

Ryan’s eyes light up. “Yeah?”

“I don’t know why,” Shane mocks, even though he wants to run to the intercom and tell the entire student body that the crush he has on Ryan Bergara is mutual.

“At least I’m not the one who had a crush on Steven Lim earlier this year.”

“I thought we were past this,” Shane groans, hands squeezing around Ryan’s waist. “I never liked Steven, I always liked  _you_.”

Shane expects another barb or typical sassy remark from Ryan, but instead, he gets to watch as a pretty blush spreads across his smiling, awed face. “Really?”

“Yes, Ryan,  _really_ ,” Shane tells him. “I’ve liked you since I saw you laughing with the lunch lady on your first day here over who knows what.”

“That was literally five minutes after I stepped into the lunch room. And your first time laying eyes on me.”

“Yep.” is all Shane has to say to that, and then Ryan is pitching forwards and kissing the hell out of him.

The very small, rational part of his brain that’s still with the program is telling Shane that making out in the office is probably not their best move. But that very, very,  _very_ small part is majorly overridden by the feeling of Ryan’s arms curling tighter around his neck to pull him in, and the feeling of their mouths sliding together, rushed but also precise, and the feeling of his heart hammering away in his chest. All he really cares about, over the fear of getting caught by their principle or the middle-aged, Christian secretary, is that Ryan is pretty much boneless against him and he smells like cotton and antiseptic and some light, spicy cologne.

He’s not really sure how long they kiss for, but it’s long enough that the secretary has time to return from wherever she went to. One second, Shane is kissing Ryan Bergara very thoroughly and trying not to smile in between the slide of their lips, and the next, he hears the far door open and a couple of voices float through- including the secretary’s.

He lets himself press one more hard, sweet kiss to Ryan’s eager mouth, and then he forces himself to pull away and catch his breath.

“Secretary’s coming,” Shane gasps, as quietly as he can manage with his heart racing and his throat tight. “I gotta go.”

Ryan looks extremely put out by this news, but Shane knows that he knows that they’re already pushing their luck, so Ryan just sighs and unwinds his arms from around him.

“Thanks for coming to visit me.” Ryan whispers, patting his shoulders. “And doing that cool thing with your tongue. That was awesome.”

Shane blushes as much as he grins, and with a lot of difficulty, finally gets off of the floor. “If you want, I can pick you up after Lit and show you how to do it, too.”

He’s delighted to see that Ryan is also trying not to blush, is trying to hide it by a big, sloppy grin. “Sure thing, big guy. See you then.”

Shane looks at him for another beat- at his big, brown eyes and his sweet smile and the cuts and bruises all over his face- and his heart squeezes, knowing that he’s allowed to look at that face all he wants now, is allowed to kiss it if he wants. And he does just that, before he makes himself skedaddle. He cups a hand around Ryan’s gorgeous, smiling face, and presses one last kiss into the corner of his crinkled eye. Ryan’s breath stutters against his cheek, so much different from their panting in between the hungry kisses, but the laugh lines don’t disappear as Shane kisses them. They only seem to grow, even as he leans back and lets his hand fall from Ryan’s face.

“I’ll see you in a little bit,” Shane promises, hardly more than a whisper. They stare at each other for a beat, two beats, and then Shane makes himself leave the office. He only gets one last glimpse of Ryan before he sees a door opening and the voices float out, louder than before, and then he takes off for Peterson’s class.

When he gets back to class a few minutes later, stupid grin all over his face and mouth suspiciously kiss-red, Peterson does nothing but raise her eyebrows at him. His friends, on the other hand, all stare at him in shock. Shane is too busy thinking about the way Ryan’s strong hands flex against whatever he’s holding when he kisses to care.

**_~.~.~_ **

After Ryan kicks some dude’s ass for fucking with him and Shane, and Shane asks him to be his boyfriend, everything falls into place.

Ryan officially joins the group of “intelligent yet stupid as fuck gay kids,” as Zach puts it, and has no reservations about sitting with them at lunch, loitering around the band room and/or after school food runs, going to the arcade with Keith, Ned, and Daysha on the weekends, and studying with them until the late hours of the night. He hangs out with just Jen sometimes, or Jen and Steven, or Eugene and Zach, and sometimes Shane will show up somewhere with the missing pieces of their gang and find Ryan in hysterics with Andrew and Sara and he just stops and stares. Every time he watches Ryan opening up to the others in the group without hesitating or reading into everything, his smile gets wider and wider. He looks free, Shane thinks, and wishes it could have been like this since September. Since kindergarten or fourth grade or middle school, when everyone trickled in piece by piece to create their functional, dysfunctional group of friends.

Shane does his best to show Ryan how much he loves and adores him, and their friends try to make it a competition to show the same.

“I love Ryan more than you do,” Jen goads him as she’s hanging up streamers; Ryan is about to arrive at the Habersbergers’ house from school, where he’d had a meeting with their guidance counselor about getting into AP classes for the upcoming semester. Ryan had been a nervous wreck the entire day at school, but Peterson had secretly pulled Shane, Sara, Steven, and Zach to the side after class and told them that Ryan had _easily_ gotten into all of his classes, and he had nothing to worry about- just as the rest of them had told him. A plan for throwing Ryan a party had immediately spread throughout the other members of the group, and now they’re in the midst of setting up, trying to get it all together before Ryan arrives.

“I bet you don’t,” Shane replies hotly, though Jen’s love for Ryan does come pretty fucking close to his. “I easily and clearly love Ryan more than anyone else in this goddamn house.”

“False!” Steven shouts from where he’s arranging the snacks with Andrew and Sara. “I know for a fact that I love Ryan more than Shane ever will. And so does Keith’s mom.”

“True!” Keith shouts back in an equally loud voice.

“Not true.” Daysha gives them all a look. “If you dumbasses ever decided to pay attention to something that wasn’t who’s better at playing the trumpet or why Eugene should drop out of AP Physics, you’d see that I’m obviously the person who loves Ryan the most.”

Shane groans half-heartedly. “I feel like I get some kind of majority ruling over this whole argument, since, y’know, _I’m Ryan’s fucking boyfriend_.”

“That don’t mean shit, Madej-“

Zach’s entrance into the argument gets cut off by Mrs. Habersberger when she cracks the basement door open and shouts: “He’s here, you guys!” down the basement stairs, and they all scramble. Shane and Jen hastily finish taping the streamers and  _Congrats Ponyboy_ banner to the wall and join the others in standing in the middle of the room to await Ryan’s arrival.

They get about a half a minute of silence, before they hear the basement door creak open again and Ryan’s voice float down it.

“-so much, Mrs. Habersberger! It really means a lot to me!”

They hear him bounce down the stairs, door shutting behind him, and everyone gets their party poppers up and at the ready.

“Hey, is anyone down here?” Ryan asks, amusement clear in his voice. “I hope we’re not playing that fuckin’  _Mafia_ game again because I’m actually trash at it-“

Ryan rounds the little bend in the staircase, and only has about three seconds to stare at them all before they’re shouting: “Congratulations!” and pulling the string on their poppers. Ryan gapes at them, the epitome of surprise, and lets the little pieces of confetti fall all over his head and leather jacket while the rest of them clap and cheer and holler like a group of morons.

“What’s all this?” Ryan asks, after looking at them all in the eye and waiting for an explanation.

“A celebration,  _duh_ ,” Ned says, flapping his hands around.

Ryan points at himself. “For me?”

“Who else?” Jen laughs, and is the first one to move and pull him into a hug. “We heard about your AP results. Congrats, buddy.”

Ryan tries to pout while hugging her back, but the amazement on his face heavily outweighs it. “You guys stole my thunder. It was supposed to be a surprise.”

“You can thank Peterson for that.” Steven laughs, joining Jen in hugging him.

Sara snorts and moves forwards, too. “Also, wasn’t that big of a surprise. You’re clearly one of the smartest people in this room.”

“Probably in the whole school,” Eugene adds, and goes to join the group hug forming when Zach pulls him along. “You weren’t going to tell us something we didn’t already know, Bergara.”

Ryan splutters, trying to downplay how fucking whip-smart he really is, but they all just shush him and gather around him in a giant group hug. Their friends leave his back for Shane, so that he can wrap his giant noodle arms around Ryan’s shoulders and squish their cheeks together.

“We’re proud of you, Ry,” he says softly. The gang coo at him. “Even if we knew you’d be fine since the first day of AP Lit.”

“ _Guys_ -” Ryan groans, but it sounds suspiciously strangled and a little wet.

“Dunno why they didn’t let you just transfer into the other AP classes like they let you transfer into Lit, but whatever.” Keith tells him, and together, he and Shane successfully crush everyone in around Ryan with their size. “The group is complete. Now you get to cry in AP Econ with Zach, try to blow the building up with Ned in AP Chem, and listen to McCartney tell us how our Calculus book has ‘special healing powers’ and lean on Daysha for moral support.”

“Sounds like a great time.” Ryan says sarcastically, but his smile gives him away. They all do him a solid and pretend they can’t see the couple of tears that well up in his eyes, Shane wiping them away. “Thank you guys. Seriously. Thank you so much for everything.”

“Of course,” Jen says, suddenly soft and sweet. “We love you, Ryan. We’d do anything for you.”

Ryan’s grin almost sets the room on fire with how bright and blinding it is. He smiles with all of his teeth at them, and says, “I love you all so much.” without hesitation, and something that’s been twisting and rocking in Shane’s chest for three months finally settles down for good. Ryan manages to convince them all to break the group hug, and then he goes down the line one by one to hug all of them individually. Even Eugene lets Ryan pull him in with a big, pretty smile on his own face, and Zach, Keith, and Ned hold onto each other and whimper about how much Eugene has grown as a person.

When Ryan comes up to him, the last person in the group, the others discreetly turn away and start some music up. They’re all lightly bickering over who should cut the cake they bought and if Ned can be trusted with anything remotely sharp, and Shane’s marginally grateful for the semi-alone time he gets to have with Ryan for a few moments.

Ryan curls his arms around Shane’s waist and smiles up him differently than he smiled at the others. It’s softer, more intimate, and Shane is so, so in love with him.

“Thank you.” Ryan says, so quietly that the music almost swallows it up.

“You don’t have to thank us, man- you deserve this. You deserve to have friends that want to celebrate your accomplishments with you.”

Ryan shakes his head, like he still can’t believe that Shane just  _says_ stuff like that to him, like he still can’t believe that Shane talks to him at  _all_. It makes his stomach turn a little and makes him curl his arms protectively around Ryan’s shoulders.

“I just-” he stops, and then starts again, trying to formulate his sentence right. “It just means a lot to me, you know? To go from people at my school wanting to kick my ass all the time to you guys helping me get into AP classes and  _wanting_ to hang out with me. To go from being so fucking alone to being so fucking loved.”

“We love you so much, Ryan,” Shane says, because he’ll never think he’s said it enough. “We really, really love you. This party is mostly just an excuse for us all to talk about how great you are.” 

Ryan flushes. “Really?”

“Yeah,” Shane laughs, and presses a light kiss to the corner of his mouth. “Before you got here, I spent ten minutes debating with the others about who loved you the most.”

Ryan gapes up at him, eyes becoming wet again. “What the fuck.”

Shane sighs deeply. “I tried to convince them that I loved you most, but apparently the fact that we’re literally dating means nothing to them. Jen was about to cut my head off and I think Steven might have tag-teamed it with Daysha and Zach if Mrs. Habersberger didn’t let us know you were here.”

Ryan stares at him for a little bit longer, and then he makes a noise, something between a keen and a laugh, and pushes up on his toes to kiss Shane. Shane moves a hand up to the back of Ryan’s head to keep him close, and kisses him back soundly. Ryan is shaking a little, but he’s also smiling against Shane’s mouth, so he figures that it’s all good.

When they break apart, Ryan curls up against his chest for a few minutes, just holding onto him and breathing. Shane keeps his hand on the back of Ryan’s head and moves the other one across the broad plane of his shoulders, and doesn’t try to hide his goofy smile. The others are mostly talking amongst themselves and picking on Keith and Zach for their dorky AP Chem project idea, but Shane sees it when they sometimes glance over at him and Ryan and smile widely. The love for Ryan is clear on all of their faces, and they all see his love for Ryan on his own face, and the whole mood is nothing but love and happiness.

After a song and a half, Ryan pulls away from his chest and gives Shane a big, beautiful smile.

“Let’s go have some cake to celebrate my geniosity.” he says, moving to link their hands together. “Maybe I can teach you guys a thing or two, since you’re all so obsessed with me.”

“Take it easy, little guy- I think you’re getting the wrong impression here.”

“Am I?” Ryan teases, falling easily back into his usual snarky self. “I bet Steven will have a different answer for me.”

“I think you really have had a crush on him this entire time,” Shane accuses, but goes easily with his boyfriend over to their friends. “Maybe I should fight him to the death.”

Ryan laughs with his whole body. “I think you should thank him instead, since he’s the reason we talked to each other in the first place.”

Shane nods. “You know what, I think you’re right- hey, Lim!”

Steven looks up from his conversation with Andrew and Keith about whatever. “What’s up?”

“Thanks for hooking Ryan and I up,” he says, grinning. “You don’t know why yet, but you had a big hand in it. Thanks, buddy.”

“No problem, bro,” Steven nods back, even though he really doesn’t have any idea what he did to get them together. He doesn’t even ask, because that’s the kind of person Steven is. “Glad to help you guys out.”

“Yeah.” Ryan looks up at Shane again, moving to press their shoulders together. “I’m glad, too.”

**Author's Note:**

> i hope yall enjoyed!! i kinda just tossed this together in between writing for show me so i hope that it turned out okay :)) hopefully the next one-shot i write for these two dinguses isn't a high school au jfkdsalfsa
> 
> also if you guys actually enjoy this i might consider continuing it?? or writing another little future time stamp??? i kinda adore this universe


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